The Ballad of Larry O.

In Ottawa, Ontario
A city justly famed,
A man called Larry came to try
And play polit'cal games.

Refrain:
Sing hey-down-derry for Larry O, Larry
Confident, certain, and true
"If I can run a business, I
Can run a city too!"

He said, "I think that I'll be mayor,"
And set about to win.
But did he say "Kilrea, retire,
And I'll get you somethin'"?

(Refrain)

He told the people all forlorn,
"No taxes will you pay!
"For I'm a businessman, you see,
"And I've a special way!"

(Refrain)

"I'll keep your services entire,
"Nor cut a single job,
"For business management will save
"You money by the gob!"

(Refrain)

His words were sweet upon their ears
For zero's zero yet.
The right-wing vote belonged to him
No Kilrea ran to split.

(Refrain)

So soon he had the jewels and robe
And rule (not absolute)
The wand of business management
He'd wield to bring us loot.

(Refrain)

He cancelled transit plans because
They weren't quite right, he said.
And then there was a lawsuit raised
Upon the city's head.

(Refrain)

For cities are not businesses
And Larry's magic failed
And soon police investigate
If they should have him jailed.

(Refrain)

For it turns out in politics
You're not supposed to say
To your opponent, "Please withdraw,
"And here's what I can pay."

(Refrain)

But Larry still is resolute,
The city's on his side!
At least his friends and family are,
And some in the wool dyed.

(Refrain)

While zero, it turns out, is not
Quite zero after all.
At least we didn't vote for one
Who'd tax us one and all!

(Refrain)

So what will be our Larry's fate?
It's too soon yet to tell.
But to the end he's resolute
That he has led us well.

(Refrain)

If others disagree, it's that
They're biased against him.
If they don't see our Larry's light,
They must be slightly dim!

(Refrain)